I promised each week I would send some tips for getting through COVID19
This week is about supporting yourself and others emotionally.
Who can you be emotionally real with?
This is the time to take a closer look at your closest people. None of us can emotionally carry the weight of everything we are witnessing or experiencing by ourselves.
Now is the time to allow yourself to be emotionally honest with others.
You don’t have to pretend.
Authenticity helps.
For those of you who are used to doing emotional support with others - in healthcare and human services, and education - you are not made of anything different than others. In fact, you may be feeling the weight of this and worn through.
If you are feeling worn down:
Notice and give yourself a break.
You are not superhuman. You don’t always have to be strong.
Feel what you are feeling.
Stay checked in with yourself and call someone - a colleague, a friend, or a family member. Be a listening post for each other. Take turns talking and listening.
This is the only way through overwhelm. Everyone, including you, needs to have someone who can listen to what you are feeling.
You may be feeling helpless, sorrow, grief, and fear of what is next.
We are all seeing things we have never seen before. You may be exhausted. You may be wired. Just notice what you are feeling. Keep taking small breaks - notice when you need some recovery time to breathe, close your eyes, step outside, write in a journal, talk to someone. Don’t keep it all in and try to carry this alone.
You may also be finding your moments of grace or gratitude. Gratitude does not erase the hard stuff. You may notice both.
Moments of grace, creating art, prayer, reading, stillness, your kids, your partner, your pets - whatever helps you get moments of grace. Music, poetry, and art feed the soul and are helpful during tough times.
Your emotions are fluid. Feelings shift from moment to moment, day to day.
It helps not to guess how you will feel, but to notice - how you do feel in this moment.
It helps not to guess how you will feel, but to notice - how you do feel in this moment.
It is not permanent.
Grief
So much has changed so quickly. You had sudden losses. We are all in this together. Be kind to yourself and to others. Everyone is experiencing loss right now. The grief may be hurting your heart or your head or landing somewhere in your body. Try taking extra care with your body. It is carrying so much extra right now.
Be gentle with your body. You may notice it is hard to take showers, get dressed, wash your clothes, wash your bedding, stretch, take walks. Even though it is harder, be sure to do those small things. Be kind to your body. It is your home.
What gives you comfort?
No matter what we are walking through, witnessing, notice the very small things that give you comfort.
It may be hard to feel reassured right now. The virus is invisible and could come from anywhere.
You are not crazy if you feel scared. Feeling scared makes sense right now.
But when you are scared, do the things that help bring you some comfort.
Call a friend. Ask what they are doing for comfort.
Do the very simple things that are comforting. Look up at the sky. Read. Lay under a blanket. Rub your arms or legs. Say the comforting things you would say to a child. Write those words to yourself.
The days ahead may be harder than the ones we have just faced. We need to brace ourselves. Now is the time to circle in with your support. Find one person, one place where you can be a listener and be listened to. Truth talking helps.
Whatever you are experiencing, if your fear seems bigger at times, it is reasonable. Keep reminding yourself, this is a normal response to extraordinary circumstances.
If you need more support, call on people for help.
If you need more support, call on people for help.
The only way we will get through this is together. We will get through this together.